An amazing journey towards self-love
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…Where do I start? I would describe myself as a fighter in God’s army. Why? Because I am a product of someone who was growing into destruction but as God had a plan for my life, I have grown into something and someone. I have been a police officer for five years. The journey to becoming an officer was hard but rewarding and the greatest lesson I have experienced. |
I grew up as a twin in a broken home, but that didn’t effect me. I had a loving dad with his own family (my extended family) and a single mother who was young and experiencing much trouble raising twin girls.
They both did their best but could have done better.
I left home at a very young age and began raising and teaching myself. Brought up in the Seventh Day Adventist faith, I had the values of God.
Yes I have been gay since I could understand sex and I have never questioned that part of me. I continued my journey of life and experienced many things, people and places.
I loved being on the gay scene and finding a very small part of myself. I lived on my own worked hard and was trying to understand the harsh reality of this world.
I began to smoke and then it spiralled into a deep drug problem in which I started taking harder drugs…I was onto the road of destruction but I still had the teaching of God in me. As a year of taking drugs went past I began to see where my life was going.
I experienced working with a heroin addict and saw what I could have become if I continued on the road I was on. That night I PRAYED so hard and cried like I have never cried before and I can tell you with much pride and thanks that 6 years to that day I never touched any form of drugs again and that’s only through God’s grace and love for me.
I completed a police application and thought I would never get through…..Six months later I became a police officer after passing with flying colours. An achievement I couldn’t comprehend due to the way my life was but this was a new start and a new path.
I joined the police 04th January 2003 and I have never looked back. The Job is something that has brought great challenges and opened my eyes to many things but I have gained much growth.
I have days where I wish I could leave and make money quicker but I remind myself every day that there was a plan for me and this is the road I need to stay on. 
I joined the gym and began to notice the men pushing weights. My father was my role model and I wished to be like him. He was a body builder and I wanted to achieve a similar body and mirror him. I started pumping iron and loved the results.
I live for the gym and a healthy body but if I am honest with myself, it’s a reminder of how skinny I used to be through drug-taking, and a way of telling myself that I will never go back to that life - the gym is my drug, somewhat.
I have been going to the gym for three years now and I love everything about it. It’s my joy; my inner peace and my greatest satisfaction (especially when pumping more iron than some guys).
There are many things in my past which haunt me but I have no regrets. I have become who I am through fight, strength and most importantly, through the grace of God.
I am black lesbian woman, 26 years of age and I am moving forward to make history in my life and to make a difference in others.
This is my story….I’m just at the beginning, creating the middle, to have a great ending….What’s yours?